Chris Rock Gets Enough New Material For 2 HBO Specials!

Finally this Pellicano scandal is getting interesting! The Huffington Post obtained the 31 minute taped conversation between Anthony Pellicano and comedian Chris Rock.

The conversation details a 2001 tryst between Rock and a woman named Monica Zsibrita, or as Chris likes to call her “Big Tits, White Pants.”

Uber creepy Pellicano often calls Rock "honey," "brother," "buddy" and "babe," but oddly Chris doesn't seem to mind.

Click here to listen to the entire tape.

Here are some highlights in case you are short on time.

8:15
CR: "I know the night we went to the Ivy she had on white pants. I only noticed cause my wife's real classy and subdued and I'm out with a girl with big tits and white pants. It's just, I know people were like, 'heeey'."

(Really Chris? Do you think anyone was shocked to see a comedian out with a chick with big tits and tight white pants? Puhhhlease, as joke telling girl whose dated her share of comedians…I’m ALWAYS either preceded or soon to be followed by a chick with big tits and tight white pants.

10:30
Pellicano excuses himself to "scream at my secretary."

(Yikes, thank god I never got sent there during my temping days.)

14:00
Pellicano (reading from report): "He tried to pull out and ejaculated on her thighs. She immediately got up and went to the bathroom where she cleaned up with a Kleenex. She put the Kleenex in her pocket."

(Beware men, we ALL do this.)

14:55
CR: I've been so set up...
AP: Did you come on her thighs?...
CR: I had a rubber on. I probably took it off right when I was getting ready to come. I probably came on her ass.

(Yuck.)

22:00
AP: Did you stick it in her? Without a rubber?
CR: No

(Yuck.)

29:05
AP: We're going to get her one way or the other... Does your old lady know what's going on?
CR: No. She thinks it's over, put it that way. She knows of it.

(I bet it's a love fest at the Rock house today.)

30:05
CR: Rape is just fucking, buzz, you know?... Once you're accused of rape, you're just FUCKED, you know?
AP: That's why i want to blacken this girl up, totally. I want to make her out to be a lying, scumbag, manipulative cocksucker... Stupid bitch
CR: I'm fucked. I'm better getting caught with needles in my arm. WAY better. Needles, with pictures, there's Chris Rock shooting heroin. Much better blow to the career.

(Wrong Chris- everybody LOVES a good rape accusation joke.)